Monday Morning Mania

Hit it and Quit it
So, TMZ.com is reporting today that Larry Fitzgerald is taking a page out of Matt Leinart's book. Fitzgerald has been served by a former Raiderette that he is the father of her unborn child. The woman, a 35 year old former cheerleader and Fitzgerald got busy and she got prego. Paterno-ty test pending, Fitzgerald agreed to pay support if he's the father. I find this especially humorous since Fitzgerald is only 24 and was obviously taken in by a cougar. I love it, a washed up former cheerleader (left), who is clearly attractive, nabbed herself a rich baby daddy to pay the bills for the rest of her life. Don't these guys know what a condom is? Nobody said football players are supposed to be smart.

Weekend Madness
Well halloween weekend certainly lived up to expectations. Barely clothed women, crisp cool fall weather and lost of sports. Generally a boring weekend this weekend compared to the past month. We've finally had a weekend with hardly any college upsets to speak of. Well except Kentucky getting crushed at home by Sylvester Croom's Miss St bulldogs or USF getting beat on the road at UConn. But generally no really big changes in the BCS. OSU showed it's muscle and beat it's hardest competitor this season in a mediocre Penn St team. Michigan won it's 7th straight to show they got something for OSU in 4 weeks. Oregon held up to my prediction and took out USC showing that with a BC or OSU loss we can be watching Oregon v. LSU down in New Orleans for the Ship. This is looking like a pretty good bet, except LSU has to play the Winner of the SEC East and I predict BC will lose 2 of it's last 4 games and Michigan will finally get of the schneid at home vs. OSU. Then, Sunday, America was treated to a dull day of football that included Indy and NE winning big and the fans in Buffalo dozing off at about half-time of a 3-3 game that included one interesting play the entire game in a 13-3 Bills win. Pretty dull right? That is unless your a Red Sox fan.

Mercenary for Hire
Having a hard time getting to the top. Losing ticket sales and looking to turn the fate of your franchise around? Well have no worries. For around $300 Million dollars over 6 years and partial ownership of your franchise you can have Alex Rodriguez, Baseballs newest free agent Mercenary for Hire. As of last night, smack in the middle of the clinching WS games, super sleaze Scott Boras released a statement that A-Rod is opting out and ending his run with the Yanks. So much for his talking about having a legacy with one team then decides to opt out and move on to the highest bidder desperate for my generations best player and quite possibly one of the best players in the history of baseball (playoffs excluded). Then again who knows, maybe somewhere else he won't fold like a lawn chair in the playoffs. I remember being so excited when my favorite player growing up signed with my favorite team. Now I'm questioning A-Rods love for baseball over his love for money. Then again that could be influenced by Baseballs Drew Rosenhaus Scott Boras. American Icons for aspiring sports agents everywhere.
My top places for Gay-Rod: Los Angeles (either), Chicago (Sweet Lou), Boston (the New Yankees), San Fran (two HR Kings), NY Mets (A-Rod SS, Reyes 2B, Wright 3B)
Decision Time
Yankees expected to Announce New Manager today. My money is Girardi, who I said all along will be a perfect fit.

Weekly Monday Morning Fantasy Rant
So. After losing by 1 pt in my money league where turnovers don't count against you to a team who started Marc Bulger (5 of them) last week, There is a potential for me to be screwed and lose for the 4th straight week taking me to 4-4 after starting 4-0. This will move me to a 3 way tie for 3rd in my division (only 4 teams). How was a screwed this week you ask? Well apparently my starting of 3rbs and 2 WRs is not a legal footbal formation. Apparently the commish of my league, who is a hs football coach, has never heard of the wishbone spread. A formation made famous by Nebraska and Navy over the years. As a result, my commish has taken Brandon Marshall from my line-up who is playing tonight and replaced him with Chris Cooley. This hurts me because I was up by 200 pts (each yd is a pt) with Marshall against Cutler tonight. Since Marshall is Cutler's #1 threat i figured to cancel out some of Cutler's points and beat the first place team to be tied for first. Now I have a 300 pt cushion and need to pray Cutler bombs tonight. This could quite possibly be the worst fantasy football league ever created.

Questions and Letters
Tom Brady,
Obviously my pleas are coming back unaswered. I'll get my jollies on Sunday when we win. And if we don't. You better hope the Hoodie pulls you if you have a big lead. Otherwise you may not be walking at the end of the day.
-Peyton (and my Defense)

In the Year 2008:
Travis Henry Signs with Arizona upon reinstatement from the league and Edgerrin James' retirement.

In the Year 2030:
Local HS wins State Championship:
Today Glendale Prep won the state championship riding the offensive domination provided by Henry VII running behind the offensive line of Henry IV and VI. Meanwhile, Leinart throws for 250 yds, 140 of it to Fitzgerald III and the other 90 to Henry III and Henry X. The defense was led by the secondary entirely made of the rest of Travis Henry's children. On a side note, 3 women were arrested after attacking Travis Henry in the parking lot over backed child support. Henry, 45, is was taken to the hospital and released a short time later.

-DG1